My Shanghai: my neighbourhood

The view from our apartment.

I have completely fallen in love with Shanghai. And it's mostly because we are living in a gorgeous part of the city known as the former French Concession.  

Here's some quick snaps I took this past weekend on my iPhone.  Excuse the quality - I still can't find my camera battery in our many unpacked boxes! 

Spring is in the air, the sun is shining and the days are starting to warm up.  Soon we'll have green leaves on all these bare trees.  I can hardly wait. 

Encompassing the districts of Xuhui and Luwan, the former French Concession is on the west side of the Huangpu river called Puxi.  On the east bank of the river is Pudong with its futuristic skyscrapers and shopping malls.

But it's the leafy boulevards and distinctive Chinese-European style architecture in the French Concession that appealed. Plus the boutiques, bakeries, cafes, restaurants, bars, pubs, fresh fruit and vege, street vendors, spas... And this is just one tiny pocket of one district in a city of 20 million people.  

It can also be a surprisingly quiet oasis. Except for Sunday mornings when the congregation at the Church next door start belting out off-key hymns from 7:30am.  Just outside our bedroom window. Oh well. A tiny price to pay.

When simplicity is key

Wow, what an amazing magazine cover.

No coverlines, no histrionics.  Just a hauntingly beautiful image.  Striking and oh so smart.

A perfect example of art and news colliding in an harmonious and thoughtful way.

www.christophniemann.com

This was the best shot of the day?

I love that US Vogue have featured Rihanna on this month's cover. She's not an obvious Vogue girl with her red hair and bad girl attitude. The styling is pretty great: the dress looks banging on her body, her skin looks gorgeous and the lighting is pretty spectacular.  And I'm sure she really worked it on this photo shoot and gave them a fair array of cover options.

But sometimes Vogue's cover choices really puzzle me. There had to have been better poses for the editors to choose from, right?  In this one, she looks like her legs are fused together and she's in urgent need of a bathroom break.

I shall now call this pose "Crouching Mermaid, Hidden Toilet".

A blast from the past

I was sad to hear of the passing of hip-hop singer Nate Dog in LA overnight.  I was never a huge fan or anything.  In fact I only think I know one song of his -- but man, I really did love that one song.  I remember waiting to tape it off the radio and trying to learn the rap.  I'm sure I was too old for that behaviour but whatever.  I was into music and I had a lot of time on my hands and homework to avoid.

I guess I could have gone and bought the cassingle (ha!) or the CD but where was the fun in that?  I had a massive gettoblaster with those heavy buttons that you'd press to literally smash down on a cassette to tape your new favourite song within seconds as it came on the radio. And then you could make a mix tape. Sweetness.

I'm guessing kids don't have that these days. Now you can just download a song or an album off a torrent or iTunes, google for lyrics or watch videos on YouTube.  Kinda takes the fun out of it all really. I used to love buying a CD and taking my time listening to songs, leafing through the cover art and song lyrics. Playing stuff over and over and over.  Really getting obsessed with albums and knowing every damn lyric. This week, Jon Bon Jovi even blamed Steve Jobs personally for killing the music business. He definitely has a point.  But is it Steve Jobs or is it us?

These days, everything's just so accessible. There's no biding your time on anything. It's all about instant gratification. Don't get me wrong. I love it.  Particularly as I'm a pop culture freak and modern technology allows me to live a million miles away but still keep up to date with friends, family, news, music, TV and gossip from all over the world.  I want it and I want it now.  But is it information overload?  Probably.  Do I miss those days chained to the gettoblaster ?  Absolutely. Although now it's all about downloading and playlists.

So here's my memory for today.  Nate Dog being a regulator and me reminiscing about my teenage mixtapes on a blog from my new home in China.  It's a brave new world.

It's a Lupe Day

I know this video has been out a little while, but his new album release yesterday had me excited again.  I love that he's been "inspired" by one of my favourite tracks of the last few years, "Float On"  by Modest Mouse. I just hope he paid them some cash for the sample.  He's definitely Lupe-fised it and it's a good track but I think it's missing the heart of the original song which is just so uplifting and happy.  I can't help but sing along every time I hear it. Here, have a listen.

And it got me watching his work on this remix of Janelle Monae's "Tightrope" last year.  Gotta love Lupe.

Is Slash a good nickname?

I wonder if Saul Hudson would have been as famous if his mate's dad hadn't called him Slash* when he was 14? Would Paul Hewson's ego have exploded to epic proportions if his teenage self had not walked past a shop in Dublin called Bono Vox. Yes, there are lessons to be learned from giving and receiving nicknames. They stick.

I have a four-letter first name. How then is it possible for me to have close to 30 nicknames? Mez, Maz, Moz, Muz, Mezza, Mazza, Mozza, Muzza, Mare, Mares, Mare-wee, Memi, Mem, Marzy, Maros, Scary, Hairy, Hurricane, Nightmary. All terms of endearment carefully crafted over three decades. And I pretty much answer to all of them. Although I'm not all that keen on one of them. Unfortunately that's the one my brothers-in-law are now using so I'm going to be stuck with that for eternity. Lesson #1: if you don't like a nickname, don't tell anyone. Or you'll never be called anything else. J-Lo and Prince often have conference calls with P-Diddy and Snooki to talk about it.

Considering I received a brand new surname when I got married, the speed of new nicknames bestowed upon me was mighty swift. Weaves, Sigourney, Mystery, Dream. Yes, Mare is great, but compared to Basket? No contest. Lesson #2: when giving someone a nickname - think creatively. And don't forget cockney rhyming slang. My mate Rascal (aka Lizzie) and I go nuts when Dizzy Rascal's tune, Bonkers, comes on the stereo.  And I once heard of a bloke with the nickname Window.  His younger brother?  Louver. Classic Aussie humour at its finest.

And then there's just the plain WTF nicknames? When backpacking in Thailand about 10 years ago, I introduced myself to a fellow traveller on a hiking tour. "Hi I'm Mary". Without missing a beat, she replied: "Hey there, nice to meet you. I'm going to call you Mags". Errr. Oh-kay. Don't know how you got there (and so quickly?!) but you're a cheery Aussie and I'll probably never meet you again. Wrong. We travelled together for three weeks. Thankfully she never introduced me to anyone else by my new nickname as we tripped around northern Thailand. Which brings me to Lesson #3: Avoid the "Future Awkward Nickname Moment".

I will explain. You know a person ONLY by their nickname. Let's use Slug as an example. That's a great nickname if you're on a footy team, on a backpacking trip or in school. Or if you look like a slug. But it's kinda weird when you bump into the person you know as Slug in a different setting many moons later. Say, in an office, in a church or at a funeral. And you have no idea of his christian name. And his mum is beside him. And you're pretty certain she didn't call him Slug on the birth notice.

Some celebs have made their fortune from their nicknames: The Situation, Magic Johnson, Posh, Scary, Ginger, Baby, Sporty.... And they've often inspired others. On another backpacking adventure, this time in Europe, I shared a van with a guy who insisted on being called the name of his idol. At. All. Times. Kinda like Inception which was a dream inside a dream; his was a nickname inside a nickname. For three months, every time I wanted to speak to my fellow traveller, I had to address him as The Rock. Yes, I could smell what The Rock was cooking. A whole saucepan of crazy. Lesson #4: Be Unique.

History is riddled with great nicknames dreamed up by the tabloids: Dubya, Jackie O, Fergie. And in the past decade, they've gone crazy for mashing celebs' names for a front-page worthy moniker. Think Brangelina, TomKat, Bennifer. Unsurprisingly, I have a soft spot for those with a bit more bite. Lindsay Lohan won't answer to it, but you can try calling her Firecrotch** or Hohan. Madonna must love being called Vadge. And Jessica Alba will forever be miserable about her MiserAlba moniker.

Gwyneth Paltrow was nicknamed Fishsticks years ago by gossip columnist Ted Casablanca because she was so skinny and annoying. Clearly, nothing's changed. Although if you read her pretentiously tedious website you should know her friends call her Goop. Yes, as in poop. She was probably too busy swapping recipes with Jay-Z in Spanish to catch that her "friends" have punk'd her with a toilet-humour nickname.

But I guess it's to be expected from a woman who so easily gave her daughter a ready-made nickname. Yes, Apple Martin will be commiserating in the future with Nicole Kidman's daughter Sunday Rose over apple martinis and a Sunday roast. Lesson #5: Say your unborn child's full name out loud. And I'm guessing that Shiloh Pitt would have appreciated if Brad and Angelina had thought of the precarious situation someone could be in if they messed up their Sh and P when talking about their daughter.  Yes, Angelina called her daughter a pile of $%*#.  Let's raise our apple martinis to nicknames!




*For the record: it was because he was always in a hurry and "slashing" all over the place. Clearly "slashing" means something different in the US because in Australia he'd be permanently wearing incontinence pads.
** The tabloids were technically inspired by Brandon Davis' drunken rantings, but I'm including it here. It's almost got a Beetlejuice kind of quality. Say it three times quickly.

Is Christina Aguilera turning into a paler version of Snooki?

Worst magazine cover of the year - and it's only March

What is Vanity Fair thinking?  They have run a few howlers this past year -- Jessica Simpson, Justin Bieber.  And now Robert Pattinson inexplicably holding an alligator and wearing a floppy hat?!  Why?

Random Oscar observations

- Was James Franco on downers and Anne Hathaway on uppers? They possibly should have swapped drugs. And a drag joke?  Really?

- Melissa Leo wins most cringe-worthy speech of the night. Looking up to the heavens at the little people, talking about "her art", dropping the pre-planned F-bomb, bowing at Kirk Douglas. All while wearing a doily and gold wrapping paper.  Embarrassment.

- Did Kirk Douglas stay on stage a bit too long?

- I thought Christian Bale was Welsh?  Why does he talk like an extra from Lock Stock?  Good speech though.  That's how you do it Melissa.

- Who chooses the nominees for best song?

- Will someone please tell Gwyneth that she can't sing.  She should also open her eyes, stay away from white microphones, sequins, peroxide, flat irons and the spray tan gun.

- Does Hilary Swank work out too much?  She looked like an East German weightlifter with those buff arms.

- I bet Nicole Kidman wishes she hadn't worn Dior.  Whoops.

- Why did they start playing music so soon into Aaron Sorkin's acceptance speech?  He was not a happy camper.


- Jennifer Lawrence looked lovely. But did she realise that she was a life preserver floaty thing away from being on Baywatch?  "I'll be theeere..."

- Natalie Portman has a good memory for names. Including Russian tonge-twister surnames.

- Were my predictions right or were my predictions right? The Big Four Awards went to the hot favourites. The solution to making the ceremony more exciting? UPSETS.

- Can we get Jeff Bridges and Sandra Bullock to host next year?